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Ditties written by Morph Reeve and Cluck Everett (as was their wont)
Additional poems by Cluck Everett Here.

By Robert Julian Everett (Cluck ) Circa 2000 Singing Version Arrangement by Morphy Reeve

Early one morning, as reveille was sounding,                                                 Pastoral Air
An Air App lay sleeping in his nice cosy bed.                                                  Early one morning
Oh please don't wake him                                                                             Anon
Oh please don't shake him
Too much beer has gone to his head.

All the other Air Apps from their beds were descending,
Crawling from the warmth, to the deck cold and hard.
Now�s the time to shake him, now�s the time to wake him,
Here comes a P. O. who�s after your card.

I'm a puss PO, what d'yer think's me name?                                                   Carmen
Give us yer card, I'll run you in. CHORUS:-                                                     Bizet

I'm as puss as puss can be a puss PO is me.
I'm a puss PO, for hammocks slack Nyet nyet nyet, nyet nyet nyet!

That's another name to add to me list
I may be booed, I may be hissed. CHORUS :-

There stood the Commander tall and straight                                                Floral Dance
with shiny shoes and balding pate.
There�s the Jaunty (smells of rum),
big puss cap and inky thumb.
Out and about and round the block,
Commander's Report at 12 o�clock.

Three days 'Black', three days 'Black',                                                             Theme for a Trio
for hammocks slack, for hammocks slack.                                                     Of Sightless Rodents
Your Service Record has now been marred,                                                    (Stan Kenton)
report t' the Office for a big black card.
Three days 'Black'. The punishment will be terribly hard

Down the covered way he carried his bed,                                                      Miserere, il Travatore
to sleep in the Early Shake Hut instead.                                                         Verdi
At 0610 he would now have to wake,
because the Duty Chief would give him a shake.
Deep in this gloomy room.
Worse than a bloomin' tomb.
Oh what a way to pay with 3 days 11A.
What's to become of me?
Sunk deep in my miiiiiiiiiiisery.
Inspections, musters, corrections all day long.
Ah, how I once thought life was sweet.
The next bloke to me has smelly feet.
When I signed on the line it was all very fine,
but now, wha-a~at shall I do?

And now it's done and I can have some fun. *                                                  Goodbye
Goodbye, goodbye I am off to rejoin my happy crew.                                       White Horse Inn
I can take my girl to 'Bucko' and never mind the cost                                        Franz Lehar
and enjoy all the things that I do. And as I go I know my deadly foe,
got a draft cos he's daft,
in the eyes of the big fat Chief PO.
So fare thee well, and go to hell.
I wish you all a last goodbye.

* original not remembered - substitutes by Morph



Originally devised and sung at HMS Condor, Arbroath Circa 1951/2 by 'Cluck' Everett
Featured - Several Characters in the Ships Company (They know who they are!)

1. Tune 'Early one morning'

Early one morning, just as the sun was rising
An Air App lay sleeping, in his nice cosy bed
Oh ! please don�t shake him, Oh ! please don�t wake him
too much beer has gone to his head

All the other Air Apps from their beds were descending
crawling from the warmth, to the deck, cold and hard.
the time to shake him, now's the time to wake him
Here comes a P.O. who's after your card.!

Enter the Duty PO, who sings:-

(Tune: Torreador's song from Carmen)

I'm a puss P.O.- what d�yer thinks me name?
Give us yer card lad, I�ll run you in!
Five minutes in yer bed, yer overdue
I'll get Commanders for you
Co-man-and-ders for hammocks slack.!
Nyack! Nyack! Nyack! Nyack! Nyack! Nyack!.

That's another name to add to me list
I may be booed, I may be hissed
I'm as puss as puss can be
A puss P.O. is me
I'm a puss P.O. for hammocks slack.
Nyack! Nyack! Nyack! Nyack! Nyack! Nyack!.

2  The Air App reflects on his future (Tune: Cornish Floral Dance)

Throughout the day the Air App glum
was thinking of the things to come
and of the weekends he would lose
The tear drops fell in ones and twos
upon his dirty face.
The P. O. who had run him in
was likened to an old gashbin
a denizen of the fiery hell
and other naughty names as well!

At twelve o'clock, he took his place.
There stood the Commander, tall and straight,
with shiny shoes and baldy pate!
There, the jaunty smelt of rum
with big puss cap and inky thumb.
D.O.s., P.O.s., Chiefs as well
Hurrying here and there pellmell
Out and about and around 'block
Commander's Report at ~ @ 16 O'clock